In my ongoing quest for new snack foods, I have discovered what is currently the reigning champ. These things are amazing. Pretzel sticks (my favorite - the only twists I like are the authentic, bready Oktoberfest-style pretzel) with a chemical flavoring of ham and cheese. They are delicious. At first I thought it was only me that was addicted to them, but Gregg took a liking to them when he was here and Lewis seems equally addicted. And the other night we fed some to the cat, who probably would've done back flips for them if she knew how.
(Sorry about the sideways video. I've yet to find a way to rotate 3gp videos without converting them to some other format)
I've seen a number of funny signs here in Thailand, and this one definitely takes the cake so I figured I'd share it. This is when you enter Beach Road in Patong, which has got to be one of the slowest moving streets I've been on, due to Tuk Tuks, pedestrians and mosquitos (that's my car driver's slang for "people on 2-wheeled vehicles").
Since Halloween is just around the corner and I will obviously not be attended either my sister's or SparklyD's (I kept wanting to type SneakyD there... I think she should change her online persona) epic parties, we've decided to do it up here at the best Mexican restaurant in Phuket, and bring a little bit of North America to Thailand. And with my mad GIMP skillz (I hate Photoshop) I even put together a snazzy flyer. I reiterate my previous S-M-R-T statement.
So ya, I know I don't follow news or the like. But at least when I was living in Canada people would randomly tell me stuff so I'd have some idea what was going on. But I just realized today that the Canadian dollar is sucking ass. SERIOUSLY sucking ass. Which really really hurts me, seeing as every cent I spend is in a different currency. So what do I do?? Since coming to Thailand I've lost about 160,000 baht simply due to the Canadian dollar decreasing. That works out to over $5000 CAD in international terms. That's horrendous! So what do I do?? Do I transfer all my money to baht? Do I transfer it to USD? Do I transfer it to some other currency? No matter what, leaving it as CAD is gonna continue to suck for me so I better be like a rat getting off a sinking ship or risk going down with the shitty Canadian ship. Dammit!
Any suggestions from someone that knows what they're talking about? This really hurts.
Seeing that Halloween is rapidly approaching, I need costume ideas. Here's the criteria...
- As you know, I'm in Thailand, so the costume has to be something that people will recognize. This basically means that anything witty or punny won't work so well, as those costumes tend to play on the English language.
- I have red hair. Ideally, I'd like something that fits with that theme (i.e. Dracula probably wouldn't work so well).
- I can get a custom made costume fairly cheap (around $30 CAD), so pretty much anything is possible, though this will require time which is why I need an idea soon.
In the first of the "My New Digs" series, I'll be taking you through the view from the front yard. Actually, it's the view from sitting on the railing of the porch, which is where I generally sit when I'm out there contemplating life. The back yard isn't quite as impressive, mostly cuz there's a couple of other houses close by, but from a nature perspective it's about the same (as in there's another hill/mountain on that side as well). Anyway, without further adieu...
BTW, that's a massage (parlor/studio/what do they call them here?) across the way. And I even think it's a legit one (saw someone going in there yesterday who looked old and decrepit, and needed help getting off the bike and walking inside). So I'm gonna have to check it out sometime soon (note that if it was illegitimate I likely would have checked it out already. Heh. Heh. Why do I hear crickets chirping?).
Well, looks like SparklyD let the cat out of the bag as it were. You're reading the blog of a proud new Mexican restaurant, bar and guesthouse owner in Phuket, Thailand. Well, co-owner. Things are a little slow right now given that it's low season and all, but hopefully it will pick up come November. We recently hired a new chef from Boston. He's introduced a breakfast menu so we open at 8am now, and soon he'll be working to help clean up the Mexican fare. And we're going to be doing up some BBQ/Tex-Mex stuff as well. There's also some staffing issues that we're trying to sort out - who'd've thunk that finding quality, English-speaking staff would be difficult in Thailand?? In fact, the other night we had a birthday party for the gf and I ended up working the bar all night cuz it was super busy. So add that to my resume - bartender extraordinaire (though really it consisted of opening bottles of beer and mixing margarita pitchers).
We plan on doing some cleanup in the guest rooms as well. Some paint here, some new amenities there... basically just make things a little more appealing to the non-fratboy crowd. Though as far as Chalong goes I can't think of a better place to live. I know I had a great time living there.
Sitting in the hotel coffee shop writing this, basically killing time until I head to the airport. And I gotta say I can't wait to get back to Phuket. Bangkok's fun and all, but it's definitely seedy, and definitely expensive. So, what did I do on nights 2 and 3 you might ask? Details follow...
Saturday Sean and I went shopping for restaurant supplies. Need some major appliances for the kitchen and Sean knew of some cheap stores to get custom made stuff here, so we spent most of Saturday afternoon bouncing between stores looking for the best deals. Saturday night we we went to some fast foodish taco place which was actually quite good, and cheap. After that we bounced to some big bar for a couple of beers, which didn't really go down well for either of us. At that point it was looking like we were gonna make an early night of it but we went to a pool hall and switched to the hard stuff, which definitely changed the course of the evening. I owned a table there. Seriously, I was on fire. The only person that beat me was the owner of the bar (who I played because I was kicking everyone else's ass, and one of the waitresses told me that I had to play him after I ran about 10 games). And the only reason I lost to him was cuz I flubbed a couple of easy shots. Though in my defence I was about 4 or 5 vodka-tonics in at that point.
We were both feeling a little better after that, so Sean decided to take me to one of the other infamous Bangkok areas - Soi Cowboy. Went to some bar there (Cowboy 2?) and had a decent time. Ended up buying a bottle cuz drinks were ridiculously priced, and a bottle was 1000 baht. Only finished half of it, but at least we got to take it with us. I'm gonna hazard to say that the girls were less aggressive than Nana, but the debauchery was still rampant.
Sunday we went to the Jiu-Jitsu tournament for an hour or so, but I only saw one guy I know fight, and he ended up losing. However apparently the Tiger guys overall did quite well, so congrats to them. After that we went to Pantip which is the biggest computer/electronics mall I've ever seen. Geek heaven. I found (actually, Sean found) my phone adapter within about 5 mins of walking in and it only cost 60 baht (I'm sure I could have haggled, but really, I've been looking for it for weeks and it cost $2 once I actually found it). So from that perspective the trip to Bangkok was a rousing success.
Ended up laying low Sunday night cuz Sean had a pain in his side. And Monday I hung out in the hotel coffee shop writing the majority of this post (til my 150 baht/hour internet expired) and drinking coffee. Then I went to the airport and barely stayed awake as I bounced between the obscenely overpriced restaurant and the smoking lounge. At least I was allowed to take my beer in there.
Anyway, ya, I know... my Bangkok experiences pale in comparison to some... but it is what it is. Oh, and that guy selling the Lancer never answered his phone. Meh.
Wow. I don't even know how to describe the debauchery. The first time I came here (with Ken) it was pretty laid back. He was working during the days but at night we ended up going out to a restaurant here or a pool bar there. Even though we were stumbling distance from the infamous Nana Plaza (which I knew nothing about at the time). Well, let's just say that Sean is no Ken. Since coming to Thailand I've definitely read about Nana, but was still quite unprepared for what was in store there. I had my first introduction last night, and I'm not sure I need to do that again. The girls are 10 times more aggressive than the most aggressive North American guy, and the ladyboys are frightening. Maybe I'm just a naive Canadian (actually, I'm pretty sure I am), but I just can't comprehend what goes on behind closed doors here. Actually, I can, since I've read a shitload about it, but my small little mind is still overwhelmed when seeing it first hand. Phuket is like a G-rated movie compared to this place. And when the bars in the plaza close at 2am, all the girls looking for "customers" hang out in the parking lot of the Nana hotel... ironically the hotel that Sean chose for us to stay in. I gotta give the guy credit though... he's pretty funny and tends to fuck with everyone. It was kind of like watching a comedy movie, except that occasionally he'd include me in the scene, usually in a detrimental way (along the lines of Santino's "He likes you!" which he occasionally yells out to random girls as we're sitting at a bar or walking down the street, pointing at me).
Also, shit's expensive here. We went to some clubby club (Nana Disco) and beers were 180 baht a bottle. That's like $6 CAD. I thought Thailand was supposed to be cheap (and, well, it is, just not in this area apparently). We also went to some bar (Carnival?) that had a mechanical bull which the boys (excluding myself since I just wasn't drunk enough) proceeded to ride while getting smacked in the ass with a rubber hose of some sort by some cowgirl-looking chick. Good times(?)
Anyway, today looks like it's gonna be a little more low key, at least until the sun goes down. Gonna hit a few malls and maybe check out the Jiu-Jitsu tournament. After that who knows what Sean has in store.
Heading to Bangkok today. There's some Jiu-Jitsu tournament that the Tiger guys are competing in, including Santino, and Sean (the owner of Dos) wants to go and wants me to tag along so that he's got someone to drink with, since the competitors will obviously not be making late nights of things. So, against my better judgement, I agreed. I just got settled in to the new house and was kinda looking forward to some quiet nights here, but I guess that'll have to wait til next week. I get back on Monday night, so updates will likely be scarce until then. Really, I'm hoping to find the Nokia AD-50 - a 2.5mm to 3.5mm headphone adapter for my phone. A $5 piece of tech. If I can find it there the trip will be worthwhile.
See, I haven't lost all my geekiness yet you naysayers!
Oh, and I'm also gonna try to take a look at a sweet looking '92 Mitsubishi Lancer EVO3. They're asking 119,000 baht for it. Which is probably more than it's worth, but I still wanna take a look and possibly take it for a test drive. Man I'd love to own a Lancer!
Now, anyone that knows me knows about my passion for bacon. And pork in general. So I figured there was no way I could go wrong with deep fried pork goodness. And how right I was! It was like eating bacon on steroids. Crispy, salty, porky goodness that you eat with your fingers. I'm sure it's the most unhealthy thing on the menu, but OMG was it good! I just need to make sure that I listen to the voice in my head occassionally, or I'll be eating it every day.
A buddy asked me to map out a few of the places I've mentioned on this blog, so here it is for those of you unfamiliar with the terrain. As a sidenote, I've moved out of Dos into a new, 2-bedroom house in Rawai (and am looking for a roommate since it's more house than I need so if you're interested drop me a note). Seems to be about 600m to some small little beach, and 1-2km to Nai Harn. Haven't checked out the little beach yet, but I likely will today or tomorrow.
View Larger Map
UPDATE: So I've determined that the "small little beach" mentioned above is called Ya Nui beach, and have added it to the map. Still haven't been there yet but definitely want to make a trip tomorrow. I might even walk and see how long it takes.
Wow. I totally forgot about this (I know, I know... I'm a blasphemer!). Anyway, it's what?... the 1st Friday of October? Sec... Oh! According to wikipedia, it's the Friday before Canadian Thanksgiving. Which makes it... Sec... October 10th to the 18th.
Wow. oktoberfest.ca just played some 30 second dumbass Oktoberfest sound bite... which was louder and far more obnoxious than my DJ Lugvig. Not cool.
Anyway, suffice it to say that the upcoming parties to Dos Gringos are, in a particular order...
- Saturday, September 21st - Underwater Clean-Up - Invited the volunteer divers here for a complimentary margarita. No clue what the turnout will be, but any promo is better than no promo.
- Gf's b-day. Officially it's October 1st, but we're celebrating on September 30th since you always want to be celebrating the actual b-day when the clock turns midnight. That's a rule... don't forget it.
- Oktoberfest - Sometime between the 10th and the 18th. I'll sort this out in the next day or two.
- Halloween - October 31st. We're trying to get a bunch of the bars on the street in on a sort of ticket-based trick-or-treat deal. We'll see how that works out. Details to come.
Saturday night I stayed at gf's place cuz she had the day off on Sunday. Parked my rented beater outside where I always do when I go there and thought nothing of it. Sunday morning we come downstairs around 11 and I start the car, and all of a sudden there's some Thai lady yelling something at us in Thai. Gf tells me to shut the car off for a minute and goes over and talks to her. Apparently the big semi that's parked in front of me backed into my car and hit the front right corner. And it just so happened that there was a cop there when he did it. Since they didn't know who my car belonged to (and likely assumed it was a Thai, not a farang) the cop took this guy's keys and had him wait at the police station until I went down there to swap insurance info or whatever. Now, given what I've both read and heard from talking to local farangs, apparently if I get in an accident, whether it's my fault or not, I'm supposed to just keep on driving. Seems that there's a little onesidedness when it comes to Thai justice, and no matter who's at fault, the farang is. So I was a little wary about going to the police station, even though the accident occurred while my car was parked. But I had gf with me to act as my lawyer and translator, so figured I'd be ok.
Went down to the cop shop and the driver of the semi was sitting there waiting patiently. Seems the infraction occurred 2 hours earlier, so he'd been twiddling his thumbs since then. I'm sure that when they realized that I was a farang and not a Thai they were kicking themselves for even bothering to report it. But everybody seemed cool. The cop had already taken this guy's statement and didn't ask me for one (obviously, since I wasn't around). Before I signed it I had gf read it over and make sure it was on the up and up. That's another thing that I've read... don't sign anything that a cop hands you to sign unless you get it translated / read by a lawyer first. But since it appeared to be ok I signed it. After that we went downstairs to some other cop who apparently spoke (better?) English and proceeded to literally copy the printed statement into some book by hand. Definitely not the most efficient system. The driver had to pay some sort of fine at this point, then we agreed to meet back up at 7 for his insurance guy to assess the damage to my car.
On my way back to the frat house the owner of the car called me (apparently he'd received a call when his vehicle had been reported as being in an accident) and thought, given that the incident occurred in Patong, that I'd been drunk driving and totalled the car, or something to that effect. When I told him it happened while the car was parked and I was sleeping he relaxed a bit. Took it back to him and swapped for an upgrade. At 7pm I went back over to his bar and we waited for the driver and his insurance dude. They came by, took some pictures, filled out some forms and went on their merry way. Well, actually it wasn't so merry. But I guess that's the way of insurance folks. So, while the car is being repaired I have an upgraded version. Though the upgrade includes automatic transmission, which kinda sucks cuz I was really enjoying driving stick again. Hopefully it won't take too long to get fixed. Ironically the owner got a call as the insurance guy was there, asking if he had an automatic he could rent for a month... and he'd given me his last one as a replacement. C'est la vie I suppose.
I'm beginning to understand why September and October are considered low season in Phuket. Since September 1st the rain has not stopped. Ok, that's not entirely true, as there are times of the day where it's simply overcast and no water is actually falling from the sky. But every day since September 1st there have been massive downpours. Last night I felt like Dorothy in The Wizard of Oz and thought my house was going to blow away. The combination of wind and crazy amounts of rain actually prevented me from sleeping for a large part of the night. Interestingly enough I was sleeping in a room without a/c (but with a floor fan and ceiling fan) and I actually had to turn the floor fan off because I was too cold. Assuming I can actually get a good night's sleep (the last couple of nights have been sketchy to say the least) I may actually start training again. This weather might allow me to reduce my sweat output to that of a normal person in 30+ degree weather.
I love these guys.
I've been sitting on my Vonage router (figuratively, not literally) for a month or two now. But today Santino was moving out of the frat house so I figured I'd finally take advantage of his setup (i.e. long CAT-5 cable and physical telephone handset) to make sure my router was working and that I could receive voicemail. Well, it turned out that there was some sort of problem and I needed to get on the phone with tech support. No worries though. Vonage tech support is some of the best I've ever encountered. Sure, they dumb shit down a little too much for me, but that's ok ("Look in the lower left-hand corner of your screen. Do you see the button labelled 'Start'? Ok, click that"). I've been on the giving end of support and I know that unless you're sure of the level of competence on the other end of the phone, you have to err on the side of caution. At any rate, after about 30 mins of router resets and the Vonage dude doing shit on his end I was able to connect and get a dial tone. So, for all my friends and family, my old Toronto number is now up and running again (you know, the Number of the Beast). I won't actually be answering it right now as I don't have a long ethernet cable nor a handset, but it does go to voicemail which gets emailed to me immediately. And within the next month I'm moving out of the frat house so will likely set up a genuine office. Then all I need is some work to make me feel like I'm actually contributing to society. Or something like that.
Also, I know it's been awhile since my last post. There's been some movin' and shakin' going on that I'll be posting about shortly, but don't want to jinx it by talking about it prematurely. Oh, and for those of you that were worried about me and the gf, crisis averted and we're all cool now. Thanks for caring :)
Carl moved into his new place today (which I might add is a steal at 8000 baht/month for 2 bedrooms with a/c, living room, kitchen, huge bathroom and fully furnished) so decided to have the boys over for poker. And though I'm no expert, I cleaned house. Played 2 games and I placed second in the first and first in the second.
Total baht for buy-ins: 1200
Total baht won: 3000
Net baht: 1800
Not too shabby if I do say so myself.
The other day I ate at some restaurant I hadn't been to before overlooking Chalong Bay. Normally the view from this place is spectacular, but it was raining so we couldn't sit outside and it was nighttime so I didn't take any pictures. But that's not the point of this post. I ordered some sort of stir-fried beef, and it was served with bunches of peppercorns. I had no idea that peppercorns actually grew in bunches like grapes, but it seems they do. And man, when you bite into a bunch of peppercorns like that it fills your mouth with peppery goodness. Who knew?
Ok, so it was more like 10:00pm. Santino realized that I was feeling a little down in the dumps, so took it upon himself to cheer me up. We rolled out of the frat house around 10:00 and arrived at Nai Harn around 10:10. Then we spent about 45 mins swimming and body surfing 5' waves. It definitely reminded me that I'm living on a tropical island surrounded by ocean, accessible anytime day or night. Good times.
And tomorrow I have to wake up by 9:30am so that they can perform some sort of pest control in the frat house. I just hope it doesn't kill the geckos. I like those dudes.
Let's start at the beginning. I've been sort of dating this girl in Thailand for about 2 months now (maybe 3). She's super cool. But in the meantime I've also befriended a bunch of bargirls. Mostly cuz my buddy (Carl) is dating one, so she obviously introduces me to her friends/coworkers. Anyway, it's all been cool, we've hung out, gone drinking, gone clubbing, no expectations. On to the story...
Last night we went out clubbing. Went to Laguna which is pretty much the only cool bar in Rawai/Chalong. There was me, 3 girls (Carl's girl and 2 of her bargirl friends) and some Thai dude. No problem. Roll in there, I'm feeling like king shit cuz I got 3 girls. Then shit just exploded. Every girl on the street that I've talked to in passing or just had some sort of contact with was there. Most of them I didn't even know their names, but they knew mine. Had a few conversations but I was super fucked up. At one point I was sitting outside talking to someone (don't ask me who), and when I left the conversation I sort of backed up and ended up stepping in the fish pond. So I scraped my knee to shit and also soaked my shorts up to my ass on the right side. But really, only 2 or 3 people saw it and I was just that much more mysterious when I rolled back inside.
But here's the clincher. Evening was all good. Just a lot of fun. Then we're hanging out in my place and Jit (aka Pimp/Mamasan) says to me "Joy and Jak have to work today. If you pay their barfine they no have to work". Now, my initial reaction to that was "fuck off". But then I got thinking about it, and what it comes down to is a good day. Basically, I can pay $15/girl for them to not have to work today and generally just lounge around and enjoy themselves. In other words, $15 = great day. If someone had the opportunity to do that for me and didn't take it I'd... well, I'm not violent so I probably wouldn't do anything. But I'd be super pissed. So at the end (actually beginning since it was around 10am) of the day I decided to just pay their barfine so that they had the day off. I knew from the get go that I'm never gonna see either of them naked, so the barfine ($30 for both of them) is really just an exercise. Having said all that, here's the part that bit me in the ass...
My Thai girlfriend is coming here tonight. We have a "date" of sorts. At any rate, I told them this up front, even before I agreed to pay the barfine, saying I was unavailable past 4pm. "No plomplem" they say. But then once everything is settled they say they're gonna have a party tonight cuz they don't have to work. "No plomplem" I say, cuz whatever. They can do what they want with their day off and I'm unavailable anyway. But then they start laying into me, telling me that they want to "repay" me. I seriously just told them no. I basically said "I have a girlfriend and she's coming here tonight. If you want to 'repay' me you can do it another night, or just don't worry about it". Apparently "don't worry about it" means "OMFG I need to deliver an ultimatum". So I actually got an ultimatum delivered, which basically consisted of "if you not cancel with girlfriend tonight then maybe you never get repayed", to which I responded "OK", with no intention of cancelling with girlfriend. And what happened then, you might ask? They actually got angry at me, cuz I wasn't making myself available to them on the night that I paid their barfine. But to me, that wasn't the point... it literally was a cost/benefit scenario. $15 so that someone doesn't have to work for the day/night is well worth it, IMHO. I actually don't want anything in return. I just want them to have a good day/night and be happy. So, I now have a bunch of Thai bargirls mad at me because I paid their barfine but WON'T let them "repay" me (whatever that means). I'm dumbfounded.
EPILOGUE
Well, turns out that I fell asleep and my girlfriend showed up, knocked, called me, texted me, hung out outside my door for 30 mins, then left. I'm an asshole. And it seems like that may have been the straw that broke the camel's back as it were. So what do I do to fix things? I go out with the aforementioned girls. Had a fun time and all, but I'm definitely thinking I need to run some damage control tomorrow. Assuming that's even possible. But we'll see. As of now, I'm going to sleep.
